The concept of marriage has changed over time. While this is so, it has remained a vital part in society formation and it still has its merits for those who still value it, both in its sacredness and in its emotional gravity.
Marriage has many faces. From the generations of the past up to the present, marriage occurs for different purposes that are validated by society and by unwritten rules of life and love.
One type of marriage, the most sought after kind of marriage, the marriage that is said to be ideal and is the ‘real thing’ among all marriages, is a marriage bound by love. Love between two people who wish to spend the rest of their lives together, to grow in that love and to have a family born out of that love. It is the union of two people, who were once strangers, now with the desire to treat each other as one through marriage. They marry to receive the blessing of the Supreme Being, and they marry to make the union legal and unbreakable.
This type of marriage is what romantics hope for. This is the marriage that they search for. They think that marriage will determine that what they have with someone, the emotions and the feelings, are indeed true love. For these people, the only way to prove your love is real is to make it official in the eyes of God and in the eyes of the court.
Another type of marriage is an arranged marriage. The reason for this kind of marriage, just like in the old times, is to keep a certain lineage alive. Royals wed royals, clans unite through the weddings of heirs, etc. Now that things have become more modern, the concept of arrange marriage is still as it is, only, instead of clans, businesses are solidified through weddings, and power and wealth are kept intact through this set-up as well.
This type of marriage is scrutinized by those who believe that only love should bind marriage, while the people who prefer arranged marriage for a secured future, looks down on people who marry for love.
The debate on this will never cease to end, because each type of marriage have their merits and their flaws. Those who bind for love, though not all of them, tend to marry a person because of love alone, disregarding the impact that their marriage could bring in their future. They believe that love could conquer all, despite the difficulty. On the other hand, those that bond for power and money lack love and sincerity in their marriage.
This is not to say that all marriages are a failure. I may have encountered a lot of failed marriages in my life as a marriage counsellor, I still believe that some marriages are a success, and there are lots of those.
The success of a marriage lies in the desire of the couple for it to be successful; it’s that simple.